Our Volunteers: Ordinary People Doing Extraordinary Work

Our volunteers are the lifeblood of our organisation, and we are constantly in awe of them. Our dispatchers answer the phone each time with care, compassion, and a deep desire to offer the gift of memories to grieving families. They answer, not knowing who will be at the other end, not knowing the story or the heartbreak they will hear.

Our photographers enter rooms filled with heartbreak. They witness first-hand the devastation that comes with infant loss. They see the perfection of these babies and bear witness to a grief that most people will never experience.

So, our volunteers must be extraordinary people, right? They must be a small group of individuals who are specially equipped to offer this service.

Actually, no.

They are ordinary people. Empathetic, yes. Caring, yes. Generous with their time and talents, absolutely yes. But at one point, each of them would have thought that volunteering for NILMDTS was something they could never do. And yet, they do. We asked our volunteers to share some insights into why they chose to volunteer, what fears they had, and what advice they would give to someone considering signing up. Here’s what they told us.

What made you decide to volunteer?

• "To give back to a fabulous organisation that helped heal my broken heart."

• "The grief and loss that my mother-in-law still feels after her first child died at birth nearly 70 years ago. She never even saw her, never mind had a photograph. She frets that when she dies, no one will have any memory of little Helen Ryan. I’d been aware of the work of NILMDTS through a visit from one of your volunteer photographers to a camera club I belonged to and was able to make contact and apply when I felt competent enough to perform the task."

• "I haven't had to use the service, but when I heard about it, I thought it would be lovely to help a little when families are in need at a time when they might feel lost and vulnerable."

• "My second child died shortly after birth, so I feel a strong empathy for other families going through this, and I feel that lending my skills to NILMDTS is a meaningful way to honour my son’s memory."

• "In memory of my niece Marianne. My brother and sister-in-law had an amazing home photo session with NILMDTS, and I wanted to help to remember her."

• "To give something back to the community using the one skill I do have."

• "My wife suffered several miscarriages, so when I accidentally came across the website, I decided I wanted to use my skills to help others."

• "I watched CreativeLive with Sandy Puc, and I also had a friend who had a baby who passed away and only had one faded photo. She treasured that so much, and then I saw the importance of those images, so I knew I could help."

• "I feel extremely lucky to have the family unit I have, and I felt I needed to give something back, if only time."

What was your biggest concern before signing up?

• "My heart ❤️ and emotional ability to deal with sessions."

• "How this might mentally impact me, fear of disappointing families if they weren’t happy with my work, and that I would get upset on the phone with another bereaved parent."

• "That my images would appropriately preserve the memories that families had of their child and help reinforce that child’s place in their family story."

• "How I would handle it emotionally."

• "I was worried that it would be upsetting dealing with families who have endured such a terrible trauma."

• "If I'd be able to do a good enough job for the families."

• "That emotions would make me unable to function properly."

• "Being able to hold it together in the hospital."

• "If I would be able to do enough to make a difference."

What has been the most positive thing about volunteering?

• "Meeting babies and making them feel remembered."

• "Being able to document such a sacred time for families."

• "Knowing you play a tiny part in helping someone at the worst time of their lives."

• "The evidence that exists which suggests that having photographs of their deceased infant is helpful and beneficial to the families."

• "Being able to give someone a meaningful gift at a very difficult time."

• "Part of a group giving the gift of remembrance photography – very passionate about the power of photography."

• "Helping families by taking the initial call and trying to source a photographer in time."

• "The team of volunteers is amazing, a very supportive and welcoming group."

• "Feeling that you make a difference. Hearing back from the photographers is always lovely."

• "The knowledge that I am helping people on the darkest day of their lives."

• "In the short time I've been volunteering, I've found that the other, more established volunteers have been amazing. The WhatsApp group is a brilliant support resource."

• "For me, it's seeing parents love their baby and being able to capture images that they, should they choose, are comfortable sharing with family and friends."

• "Helping families in crisis."

• "Knowing that you're helping others in a particularly tough time in their lives, even if you never get any feedback from them. However, when you do hear from the families later about how much they appreciate what you've done, that's amazing!"

• "The comments and messages from parents."

• "Being able to give the gift of photographs to somebody who will appreciate and love them forever."

• "No words can adequately describe the sense of satisfaction when walking away from a session. If I never did anything else with my camera, I’d be more than content. Being part of a team as well, having the very supporting calls with John and Anne Marie before my first session was incredibly helpful as I went in there feeling like part of a team – not feeling so alone made all the difference when it came to nerves."

Lastly, what advice would you give to someone considering volunteering for NILMDTS Ireland?

• "Do it! It's so very rewarding ✨️"

• "Speak to a NILMDTS photographer to understand the role more."

• "Just go for it. You will never regret it."

• "That there is plenty of support, encouragement and empathy in the NILMDTS family, and that any anxieties experienced have also been experienced and overcome by many in the group."

• "Absolutely try it. It’s a wonderful thing to do and gives so much to the families. You get better at it and find your own way of dealing with it. Very rewarding."

• "100% go for it."

• "Do it straight away, you are helping families make memories of their precious baby."

• "Do it! There is great peer support throughout, and excellent tailored local training (for dispatchers)."

• "It's a great organisation, and the support is amazing. It's humbling to see the work the photographers do and a great feeling to be a part of such an amazing and precious gift to the families."

• "Do it!! It will be the most rewarding experience of your life."

• "If you have a little empathy and compassion, this is a very rewarding role. We cannot, as volunteers, take away the terrible loss. We can only provide a form of basic practical help to ensure that parents have a lifelong physical memory of their little loved one."

• "Do it. If any part of you thinks that you may be able to contribute in any way, then you can. The gift you can give to families going through this grief is unmeasurable."

• "Go for it! It's not often photographers get a chance to use their skills in a voluntary capacity."

• "Take every opportunity to ask and receive advice from the more experienced members."

• "If you have the time, just do it. There are plenty of NILMDTS volunteers who will give you support and help you manage through the sessions."

• "If you have the time, do it."

• "Absolutely go for it if it is something you feel able to do. It’s not an easy thing to do, and it’s not going to be for everybody, but it’s really satisfying and such a special way to use your skills."

• "You will never use your camera to create a more meaningful, more treasured, more important photograph. Do it. It will be tough at times, but so incredibly rewarding. You will be so supported by our team."

Thank you so much to each and every one of our amazing volunteers. Ordinary people doing extraordinary work and making a difference that is beyond description. If you are thinking of joining us, contact us , and we’ll be in touch to discuss. No pressure or commitment, we are happy just to talk you through everything and help you make an informed decision.